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***** If your eyes DO start itching, the only thing you can do to stop the disease from spreading is to go to a friend and have them punch you in the face for sending out a forward. It has to be a hard punch in order for the disease to be knocked back into dormancy. Using a baseball bat or other implement is often effective.
This is a real problem, and it is becoming an epidemic. To find out more, go to: aamc.org . They have the answers there. Please, don't take this lightly, if you ever want to be with the one you love, or want to be successful in life, or have magical powers, or JUST DON'T WANT TO DIE, don't copy and paste this or any more bulletins. Think of the kittens...
posted by David @ 11:28 PM
37 Comments:
DO NOT READ THIS BULLETIN!!!
Oh no! I'm sorry! You started reading it! Now you have Bulletinitis! It's a very rare and painful sickness that lies dormant for years and only flares up when you send a forward, or copy and paste a bulletin. If you send this, or any other message you get from anyone, you will have the full-blown disease! Please take this seriously, I'm not joking! The disease starts slowly, just itching around the eyes and a few sore muscles/joints. It intensifies within a few hours, with cramping in the legs, and the skin around your fingernails starts to pull away, leaving gaping wounds. It then builds to a horrifying crescendo, as your face literally falls off of your body moments before your heart starts pumping out acid instead of blood, which eats your body from the inside out. After the disease takes it's toll on the human involved, often little kittens will come up to the vile mess on the ground and step in it, thereby being eaten by the acid themselves.
***** If your eyes DO start itching, the only thing you can do to stop the disease from spreading is to go to a friend and have them punch you in the face for sending out a forward. It has to be a hard punch in order for the disease to be knocked back into dormancy. Using a baseball bat or other implement is often effective.
This is a real problem, and it is becoming an epidemic. To find out more, go to: aamc.org . They have the answers there. Please, don't take this lightly, if you ever want to be with the one you love, or want to be successful in life, or have magical powers, or JUST DON'T WANT TO DIE, don't copy and paste this or any more bulletins. Think of the kittens...
uh-oh. i think i'm feeling the efects (and by that, yes i am making fun of you)
i feel bad about making fun of you so im going to do something nice.
when you need a little encouragement, remember God provides. for all the negative things we have to say to ourselves, God has a positive answer. You are loved.
you say: its impossible
God says:all things are possible (luke 18:27)
you say: im tired
God says: i will give you rest (matthew 11:28)
you say: nobody loves me
God says: i love you(john 3:16)
you say: i cant go on
God says: my grace is sufficient(II cor. 12:9 & psalms 91:15)
you say: i cant figure things out
God says; I will direct your steps(proverbs 3:5-6)
you say: i cant do it
God says: you can do all things (philippians 4:14)
you say: im not able
God says: im able (II cor. 9:8)
you say: its not worth it
God says: it will be worth it (romans 8:28)
you say: i cant forgive my self
God says: I FORGIVE YOU! (I john 9:1 & romans 8:1)
you say: im afraid
God says: i have not givin you a spirit of fear (II timothy 1:7)
You say: i feel all alone
God say: i will never leave you or forsake you (hebrews 13:5)
Whenever youre feeling down, read these verses and God will do the rest!
Wow, who did the previous? Duckman? whoever it was, that was funny...
actually duckman did all of them (beleive it or not)
david im sill waiting on that book and i wont leave you alone until you do! And if it still isn't posted by the end of the month, ill be forced to do something we al dont wont me to do! write a book! AND IT WILL BE A MYSTERY TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(dum-dum-dum!)
"oh, no! Not a MYSTERY!" cries the dismal in distress.
"oh, yes my dear! a Mystery!!!! Mu-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaaaa!" cries the power starved villian.
007
im a weird child arent i? all in favor of me being odd say "ye" all not in favor say "ne"
if nobody posts something withen the next 24 hours, this web page will be mine! mine i tell you!!! AH-HA-HA-HA-!!!!!
yes, duckman. weird you are. but that's ok, as long as you know you are weird and keep it in check around the authorities. uh...i gotta go, they're here for me...
CURSE YOU SIR DAVID AND YOUR QUICK RESPONSE! CURSE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!!!!!!!!
seriuosly tho. iWANT that book. WAAAAAAAAANT it.
oh, and we had our 2nd football game of the season. (i will keep u updated on it.) we won 42-14. i was in for the last play. our QB kneed the ball tho so i didnt get to do anything. BUT I WAS THE ONLY SEVENTH GRADER TO GO IN. (thats not supposed to be in caps but im too lazy to change it) you really have to be careful with football "my-my-my mo-moma s-says f-fooseball is the devil"
p.s. arent straight jackets comfortable?
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